Over the last few years I’ve come across countless situations were parents feel like they don’t know how to deal with toddlers and preschoolers. Parents get stressed out because of the “bad behavior” and I’ve received plenty of emails from those who feel that they’ve failed at being a parent. If this describes you then I’d like to invite you to enter my world and learn more about how you can take advantage of language as a toolbox for change. Parenting toddlers and preschoolers can go back to being fun again. All you need is a willingness to learn, and an appreciation for new advice.
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Hey, I'm Chris Thompson. I help stressed-out parents deal with toddlers. Grab the free lesson I've prepared for you. You'll love it. Email:

This morning I was reading an article about customer service.  The author was saying how sick he was of crappy customer service from companies that send out a bunch of form letters (cut & paste type replies) that don’t match his problem.  I know how annoying this is.  That’s why I reply personally, with a real reply, when customers email me with any kind of technical problem, etc.

Say I get an email from a customer.  The email says, “Hi Chris – I just purchased the audio course yesterday and I didn’t have time to download it.  Now my link has expired.  What can I do?”.

When I get that email I will write back to make sure the customer knows these things:

1) I tell them that I understand the problem.  I explain that the links automatically expire after 24 hours. This helps prevent digital theft.

2) I tell them I am going to reset their link immediately.

3) I tell the customer that I’m there to help, and that I’m not going to leave them hanging.

This kind of personal treatment makes customers feel good about doing business with me.  I know this because of how many replies I get thanking me for the quick and helpful replies.

So how is this connected with parenting?

Imagine if your toddler or young child tells you they are hungry.  The “stock answer” that many parents will give is, “Oh, I’ll feed you lunch when we get home”.  Then you get a tantrum, or fussy behavior, etc.

What if you took on a “customer service” role instead.  You might enter your child’s world (as I teach in the free audio lesson).  You might say, “I understand you are hungry, and I’m going to help you”.  You might then explain the facts if your child is old enough to understand.  You can say, “We don’t have any food here.  But I know we have food at home.  Would you like to eat a snack as soon as we get home?  I can take you there very soon if you are really hungry”.

My audio course has plenty of techniques to help with this type of situation.  But if you were to just avoid using “stock answers”,which are a parent’s lazy solution to a problem, then you’ll get better results more often.  Try it and you’ll see.  When your child sees that you are there to help, they behave differently.

Click here to get more information about how to deal with toddlers

This weekend I was at the park with my two daughters while my wife was out for a few hours. The temperature is starting to get warmer in Toronto, but it was still barely above freezing. It was 3 degrees Celcius (37F). I had the girls dressed in winter coats, thin mittens, and thin hats.

It wasn’t the nicest day outside. It was pretty cloudy and wet. Besides us, there was only a father and his two sons at the park. The boys were probably 5 and 7. They were running around and happy.

But I noticed something odd. The younger boy had no coat on. He was running around with a short sleeve shirt and a pair of jogging pants. My assessment is that the father probably realized this was a bad idea. But I’m betting the kid would have thrown a tantrum if the father forced him to keep his coat on. So the father caved, and opted to instead risk his child get sick from exposure to the cold.

I realize that sometimes kids can be a handful. But let’s think about this trade off. Here we have a parent that consciously chose to allow his child to freeze in order to avoid a fight. That’s a bit crazy if you ask me.

Why am I so sure this was the trade-off? Because a few minutes later, after the boys stopped running around, the younger boy sat down on the slide. The slide was wet from the prior night’s rain. His pants got quite wet, and he started to complain. Then he started to cry that he wanted to go home. It was evident to me that this boy used the same tactic to get his Dad to let him take his coat off.

As someone who has studied hypnosis and NLP I’m taught to be observant of physical changes. This boy’s body position had changed and he was visibly cold. His skin color was more pale than a few minutes ago. He was holding his arms close to his body.

Did the father offer his son a coat? No. Instead he just (understandably) complied with the boy’s request to go home. But then the young boy said to his dad, “But I want to come back after I change my pants”. To this, the father said “No – we are going home and we’re staying home”. At this point, the boy’s crying turned from gentle sobbing into all-out screaming.

This was one of those times I wish the father had my audio course. He would have understood that there are easier ways to handle the situation. I always teach parents that saying “No” is a rapport-killer, and amplifies whatever negative state the child is already in. There are better ways to get the kids home without standing in the cold having a debate about whether you’ll all return to he park after changing. It would have been easy for the father to simply shift the conversation away from this debate.

In looking at my traffic on this blog, I see lots of traffic but not enough comments. I’d LOVE to hear your thoughts. What would you have done differently?

Enjoy your children,
Chris Thompson