I just found out that you can get a copy of The Total Transformation Program for free. This is actually a pretty amazing offer, and I just hope I’m not disappointing anyone in case the offer is gone by the time you read this. They’re only giving away 1000 copies, which could go pretty fast considering how many parents seem to have trouble with teenagers, etc.

As a quick recap, you probably already know about my program, “Talking to Toddlers”, an audio course geared towards the terrible twos, and young children. I teach language strategies for dealing with the normal problems of parenting young kids.

James Lehman teaches you how to deal with much more serious problems of older kids. Problems like abusive behavior, serious defiance issues, verbal assault, etc. I’ve gone through James’ entire program (along with my wife) and we highly recommend it. If I teach language strategies, then he teaches thinking strategies to teach kids how to solve their own problems.

So how do you get it for free? It’s pretty simple. You have to be willing to provide them with feedback on the course. It sounds like this may actually take you a few hours of your time, in total, but that’s very minor in the overall scheme of things. It looks like they are simply looking to build up more feedback on the program, and you benefit by getting it for free. If you don’t provide the feedback then you will pay over $300. That’s still worth it considering the quality of the material, but if you have a shot at getting it for nothing I say go for it! Just be sure you are prepared to actually do the feedback portion.

I hope this offer is still available for those reading this. You can go check it out for yourself here.

Hey, I'm Chris Thompson. I help stressed-out parents deal with toddlers. Grab the free lesson I've prepared for you. You'll love it. Email:

The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is designed for parents dealing with difficult children from about the age of 6 through the teens.  I recommend it to my readers since it complements my audio course.

Wow – it’s hard to believe I’ve already reviewed lessons 1 through 6.    Lesson 7 will help you to stop the bad behavior dead in its tracks and hopefully provide a conclusion to all of the techniques you have gained throughout this audio course.

James Lehman refers to this chapter as the “Trigger Management Process”.  What causes our thoughts to trigger the feelings we feel, like fear, anger, and hurt?  These feelings are what ultimately cause your child to act abusively or disrespectfully.

You are probably wondering how the heck you are going to identify what triggers your child’s bad behavior.  Fear not – the first thing you will want to do is to “diminish the potential”.  Keep your children away from things that are going to get them heated.

You will need to “manage the situation”.  The parent is responsible to teach their child how to get out of tough situations should they get into one.  Lehman recommends taking a time out or chilling out by listening to music and so on.

You will learn to teach your child how to evaluate on their own whether they want to react negatively to a situation.  A child will be able to decide for his or herself if behaving badly is worth it.

Always remember to have an open dialogue at home and at school.  Authoritative figures should be made aware that the child is learning new coping strategies to avoid negative outbursts.

This lesson gives you the tools necessary to identify the nature of the “triggers” and help your child to learn to manage them.   Now it is your responsibility to take these techniques and implement them.  Good luck!

Continue reading my review of the Total Transformation Program.

Listen to audio samples of the Total Transformation Program.

Readers of this blog know that I offer an audio program for dealing with toddlers.  Many readers also have older kids, which is not where my product is targeted.  For older kids I recommend The Total Transformation Program.  It is an amazing system to help you deal with your troubled children.  Here is my review of Lesson 6.

Lesson 6 of The Total Transformation Program is all about problem solving.  Parents and children will work together to figure out their reasons for lashing out by confronting the inappropriate behavior.  Next, you will determine how best to react to future problems by coming up with an agreed-upon alternative behavior.  James Lehman breaks down these problem-solving techniques into 8 straight-forward steps.

The first and most crucial step is to “investigate.”  It is the parents’ responsibility to understand the child and to understand what motivates his or her bad behavior.  This can be done by walking your child through a series of simple questions, like “What was going on just before you got upset?”

Parents need to “confront” their child’s behavior.  In doing this, the parent must remain on a facts-only basis and not interject any feelings, blame, or emotion.  State the behavior you saw.  By sticking to the facts you’ll find it’s much easier to deal with the problem and come to a solution.

Always remember to “challenge” your child’s reactions.  Be sure to tell your kids that excuses don’t justify bad behavior, for example “even though you broke up with your boyfriend that’s no excuse for you to be yelling at everyone in the house.”

Be sure to follow up with “consequences” for the child’s negative behavior.  These consequences should involve a task and be done in a specified amount of time.  Make sure they are clear and are linked to the bad behavior.

I have briefly described a few of the steps needed to reshape your child’s behavior.  Lesson 6 explores all eight steps in more detail.  Be sure to listen to the audio track carefully and follow all of Lehman’s homework assignments for best results.

Continue reading my review of the Total Transformation Program.

Listen to audio samples of the Total Transformation Program.

The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is an amazing system to help parents deal with troubled kids.  Those of you who follow my blog know that I offer an audio program for dealing with toddlers.  The Total Transformation Program is a great program for parents dealing with older kids.

Have you ever caught yourself assuming things without knowing all of the facts?  Maybe you expect the worst from your kids all the time or feel like nothing will ever change for your family.

These are just a few examples of faulty thinking which is very common in today’s world.   Faulty thinking involves errors in the way we think about situations and/or people, which don’t help us to solve any problems.  Lesson 5 explores the importance in understanding faulty thinking and gives parents the tools needed to correct it.

“All or nothing thinking” is a perfect example of faulty thinking.  This is often referred to as “black or white thinking.”  This kind of thinking is very closed, it leaves no room for a discussion.  Teens are especially susceptible to this way of thinking.  They need to be taught the value of different perspectives.

“Mind Reading” happens when you project or anticipate your kids thoughts and feelings about a situation.  For instance, you tell your son you are going to visit his aunt.  You say you know he has no interest in going with you because it is boring, but you want him to come anyway.  This leaves the child feeling negative towards you and sets the situation up for conflict.  Instead try to give your child the opportunity to respond positively to the situation.

Parents often fall in the trap of the “Blame Game”.  We have all been guilty at one time or another of turning an issue around and putting people on the defensive.  This proves to be a real waste of time.  Too much energy is spent on blaming yourself or someone else for a real or imagined problem.

I hope that I have peaked your interest.  In lesson 5 you will learn to recognize when you or your kids are resorting to faulty thinking.  You will learn to appreciate the reasons why faulty thinking is an ineffective parenting approach.  Most importantly, you will learn how to make the changes in your thinking that promotes healthy problem solving skills in your kids.

Continue reading my review of the Total Transformation Program.

Listen to audio samples of the Total Transformation Program.

The Total Transformation Program is an amazing system to help parents deal with kids who exhibit destructive, obnoxious or abusive behavior.  Those of you reading my blog already know that I offer an audio program for dealing with toddlers.  The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is best suited for parents dealing with troubled kids and teens.

In the first few lessons of this program, we learned what causes our kids to misbehave and act disrespectfully.  I covered some examples of ineffective parenting styles and how to overcome them.  Parents play an important role in leading kids to accept accountability for their actions.

Lesson 4 outlines 27 transformation tools to change your child’s behavior immediately.   The first and most important statement to master is,  “There is no excuse for abuse.”  Always state this clearly and firmly with your children when they try an offer up an excuse for their wrong doings.  It is a powerful 6-word phrase that can stop the bad behavior in its tracks.

James Lehman says that you, as the parent, must “stop the show”.  If your kids are acting up in a car when you are heading out, you need to pull over safely, tell them they need to re-group otherwise you will be going home.  If they choose not to listen, you must follow through and go home.

Family values need to be clear and consistent.  Children need to know their boundaries and understand what is accepted in the home.

Harmless Humor is a perfect way to lighten up the mood and re-direct conflict.  Remember to keep the humor helpful and away from any sarcasm or cynicism.

If all else fails and you are left with a parenting style that is no longer working be honest about it.  Tell your kids that things have changed and explain the new way of dealing with certain behaviors.

I have only mentioned a few of the tools needed to change your kids behavior.  After listening to the complete lesson and following the homework, you will walk away feeling capable of implementing these 27 tools in your everyday parenting life.

Continue reading my review of the Total Transformation Program.

Listen to audio samples of the Total Transformation Program.

The Total Transformation Program is ideal for parents dealing with problem kids. Those of you who follow this blog know that I offer an audio program for dealing with toddlers.  The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is a fantastic system to help you deal with troubled kids beyond the toddler years.

My blog entry on lesson 2 taught you a little bit about what it means to have an ineffective parenting approach.  In lesson 3, you will learn what constitutes effective parenting roles and how to use them to help your child change his behavior.

It is the job of the parent to act as a leader and teach their kids how to problem solve, take responsibility and develop social skills.  It is important for the parent to be clear, willing and have respect for a child’s potential.

The Training and Coaching Role is about teaching kids by example.  Parents can model behavior they want to see their child learn.  Think of the parent as the “trainer” for the skills the child needs to learn to become accountable.

The Problem Solving Role helps kids identify goals and obstacles.  It is important for the parent to make sure the goal is specific, tangible and achievable.  Parents can help their kids develop strategies to overcome any obstacles.

The Limit Setting Role establishes and maintains parental authority.  This is done by establishing limits.  These limits help kids to understand how they are expected to behave.

Learning and using these effective parenting techniques with your kids will ensure that your home is filled with accountability. Be patient with yourself and your kids – transformation takes practice.  It is the responsibility of the parent to support, direct and understand their child as they develop a new sense of independence.

Continue reading my review of the Total Transformation Program.

Listen to audio samples of the Total Transformation Program.

The Total Transformation Program is geared to parents dealing with troubled kids starting at the age of 6 and up. Those of you who follow my blog know that I offer an audio program for dealing with toddlers. The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is an amazing product to help you deal with problem kids well beyond the toddler years (i.e. 6+.)

Some parents are often guilty of telling friends their kids are going through a “phase” when they act obnoxious or abusive rather than demanding a change. Kids feed off this and continue to act out aggressively convinced their parents are weak.

Lesson 2 of the Total Transformation Program will teach you how to identify ineffective parenting roles that you take on and what kids learn from them. To create change, it is important for you to practice these effective strategies.

Let’s take a look at some examples of ineffective parenting roles and what the kids learn from them.

If your child likes to push the limits by negotiating the already-established rules and you fall into the trap of re-negotiating they are learning that boundaries are not solid. The child is actually just interested in winning the battle of the negotiation rather then the actual outcome. Kids begin to see that limits aren’t real, can be changed or ignored.

If you find that you are always getting into a screaming match with your kids out of utter frustration, you have actually come down to the child’s level. They begin to see you as their peer and in turn your credibility has been lost. The parent is supposed to be the one in control, who sets limits and follows through with consequences.

This lesson will help you figure out your parenting style. To get the most out of the lesson you have to be brutally honest with yourself.  Acknowledging your own ineffective parenting approach is the first step to bringing about change in you and your child.

Continue reading my review of the Total Transformation Program.

Listen to audio samples of the Total Transformation Program.

I highly recommend the Total Transformation system for parents dealing with older, troubled kids.  Those of you who follow my blog already know that I offer an audio program for dealing with toddlers.  The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is an amazing product to help you deal with problem kids and teens (ages 6 and up).

Ever wonder what causes a child to act out negatively towards their parents?  Lesson 1 of the Total Transformation explains what triggers kids to act abusive, disrespectful or obnoxious.

As parents we tend to get easily frustrated with our kids when we don’t understand why they are behaving a certain way. Instead of understanding why they are misbehaving, we should be asking ourselves what do they need to do to make changes to resolve the situation.

These behaviors are not caused by low self-esteem or mental illness. They occur when the child is not able to understand their perceptions, thoughts and feelings.

Think about your child.  Does he or she take the victim-stance with you, never taking responsibility for his or her actions? Perhaps, your child lies either by vagueness or pretending to misunderstand you? Or maybe you have a kid who completes only part of a task but wants to reap all of the rewards and then acts angrily when he doesn’t get them? These are just a few examples of a kid’s defiant behavior.

Believe it or not, this negative behavior is learned and is often rewarded. The next time your kid starts to use negative behavior to deal with a situation, tell them that it won’t help solve the problem. Say to the child “When you said that you were sorry for swearing at me, while blaming me for making you angry, I didn’t buy the apology.”

It is important to recognize that kids need to be accountable for their actions. Please stop blaming yourself. The negative behavior is not caused by the parent. This lesson will give you the tools you need to help your kids develop good problem solving skills.

Continue reading my review of the Total Transformation Program.

Listen to audio samples of the Total Transformation Program.

I would like readers to know that I have published a review of a parenting program called “The Total Transformation” by James Lehman.

My parenting course, “Talking To Toddlers” is highly effective for the day to day problems that most parents face when dealing with young kids – typically ages 2 through 6 (even though the techniques remain effective well beyond those years, and I often get emails from customers telling me they used the techniques on adults with success).

That said – I fully acknowledge that when it comes to kids who are older than 6 and who are abusive and  obnoxious then you need to equip yourself with more than the language tools that I teach.  Essentially, what I teach parents to do is to use language as a tool to deal with what I’ll call *ordinary* problems that stress out parents.  When it comes to older children who are troubled, and are out of control, then I would not rely on my course alone.  You need a program that teaches you how to get your kids to solve their own problems.  James Lehman is an expert at this.

James Lehman has put together a tremendous program calld The Total Transformation.  I have gone through the entire program and I share my thoughts on it in my review.  Check it out here.