The Total Transformation Program is geared to parents dealing with troubled kids starting at the age of 6 and up. Those of you who follow my blog know that I offer an audio program for dealing with toddlers. The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is an amazing product to help you deal with problem kids well beyond the toddler years (i.e. 6+.)
Some parents are often guilty of telling friends their kids are going through a “phase” when they act obnoxious or abusive rather than demanding a change. Kids feed off this and continue to act out aggressively convinced their parents are weak.
Lesson 2 of the Total Transformation Program will teach you how to identify ineffective parenting roles that you take on and what kids learn from them. To create change, it is important for you to practice these effective strategies.
Let’s take a look at some examples of ineffective parenting roles and what the kids learn from them.
If your child likes to push the limits by negotiating the already-established rules and you fall into the trap of re-negotiating they are learning that boundaries are not solid. The child is actually just interested in winning the battle of the negotiation rather then the actual outcome. Kids begin to see that limits aren’t real, can be changed or ignored.
If you find that you are always getting into a screaming match with your kids out of utter frustration, you have actually come down to the child’s level. They begin to see you as their peer and in turn your credibility has been lost. The parent is supposed to be the one in control, who sets limits and follows through with consequences.
This lesson will help you figure out your parenting style. To get the most out of the lesson you have to be brutally honest with yourself. Acknowledging your own ineffective parenting approach is the first step to bringing about change in you and your child.