The Total Transformation Program is an amazing system to help parents deal with kids who exhibit destructive, obnoxious or abusive behavior. Those of you reading my blog already know that I offer an audio program for dealing with toddlers. The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is best suited for parents dealing with troubled kids and teens.
In the first few lessons of this program, we learned what causes our kids to misbehave and act disrespectfully. I covered some examples of ineffective parenting styles and how to overcome them. Parents play an important role in leading kids to accept accountability for their actions.
Lesson 4 outlines 27 transformation tools to change your child’s behavior immediately. The first and most important statement to master is, “There is no excuse for abuse.” Always state this clearly and firmly with your children when they try an offer up an excuse for their wrong doings. It is a powerful 6-word phrase that can stop the bad behavior in its tracks.
James Lehman says that you, as the parent, must “stop the show”. If your kids are acting up in a car when you are heading out, you need to pull over safely, tell them they need to re-group otherwise you will be going home. If they choose not to listen, you must follow through and go home.
Family values need to be clear and consistent. Children need to know their boundaries and understand what is accepted in the home.
Harmless Humor is a perfect way to lighten up the mood and re-direct conflict. Remember to keep the humor helpful and away from any sarcasm or cynicism.
If all else fails and you are left with a parenting style that is no longer working be honest about it. Tell your kids that things have changed and explain the new way of dealing with certain behaviors.
I have only mentioned a few of the tools needed to change your kids behavior. After listening to the complete lesson and following the homework, you will walk away feeling capable of implementing these 27 tools in your everyday parenting life.