The Total Transformation Program by James Lehman is designed for parents dealing with difficult children from about the age of 6 through the teens. I recommend it to my readers since it complements my audio course.
Wow – it’s hard to believe I’ve already reviewed lessons 1 through 6. Lesson 7 will help you to stop the bad behavior dead in its tracks and hopefully provide a conclusion to all of the techniques you have gained throughout this audio course.
James Lehman refers to this chapter as the “Trigger Management Process”. What causes our thoughts to trigger the feelings we feel, like fear, anger, and hurt? These feelings are what ultimately cause your child to act abusively or disrespectfully.
You are probably wondering how the heck you are going to identify what triggers your child’s bad behavior. Fear not – the first thing you will want to do is to “diminish the potential”. Keep your children away from things that are going to get them heated.
You will need to “manage the situation”. The parent is responsible to teach their child how to get out of tough situations should they get into one. Lehman recommends taking a time out or chilling out by listening to music and so on.
You will learn to teach your child how to evaluate on their own whether they want to react negatively to a situation. A child will be able to decide for his or herself if behaving badly is worth it.
Always remember to have an open dialogue at home and at school. Authoritative figures should be made aware that the child is learning new coping strategies to avoid negative outbursts.
This lesson gives you the tools necessary to identify the nature of the “triggers” and help your child to learn to manage them. Now it is your responsibility to take these techniques and implement them. Good luck!